A day that surpasses most days!!

Today is my dear son's birthday. It is hard to believe he is 22 years old. Not because he doesn't act it, but because it went soooo fast. He attends Roberts Wesleyan College and is in the music program as a guitar performance major. He has truly been gifted by the Lord. We are blessed to be called his parents.

Christmas doin's

Well the season has been busy for sure...baking cookies, making candy, sewing 2 quilts, 2 table runners, painting, and making ornaments. I hosted a table at a ladies Christmas luncheon, as well as sold some items at a vending table I set up there. We delivered cookies to friends, have gone to 2 Christmas parties (still have one tomorrow night). Shawn has been working hard getting the church prepared for the Christmas Eve Service. He even built a new fence for the live nativity, making it extra sturdy to keep the animals in.

Daddy came for 3 days last week to shop for my siblings and their older children. We had a lot of fun together. I just simply love that man, I am so glad he came. I got to cook some good food up for him--mum's chicken and dumplings, and my riggies. He enjoyed his time here, then headed home to busy times with my younger brother Kevin. They are shopping for the little children of the family. Totally up Kevin's alley, he loves to bless the little ones.

Sen is home for the winter break, and we could not be happier. It is a joy to have him around. It is a bit of a challenge too; keeping food in the house, remembering to go potty before he gets in for his shower, keeping laundry going, keeping food in the house... oh did I say that already? Well, it deserves said twice!

Shawn and I had a great time shopping today, thinking of our loved ones and what they might love to receive. We took a break from shopping at Starbuck's and had a early supper at Sinbad's on Park Avenue. Nothing like great mediterranean food to sustain you through a long day of shopping!

May you all find yourselves blessed with the presence of your very real Savior as we remember his birth this Christmas. I am so thankful that my father God, loves me so much, he would send his one and only son to come to earth to save us. He truly is the reason for the season.

Meeting needs-the true meaning of Christmas

Lindsey Pond is an amazing young woman from Texas whom I have gotten to know via her blog-- http://www.pleasantliving.org/

Two years ago I began a journey of getting to know a young woman who is so passionately in love with her Father God, one who is in a faith journey few have the courage to walk out.

Three short months after Lindsey married Brian, they discovered a lump in her breast. Since that time Lindsey has battled the enemy for her life while encouraging others through her blog.

In November 2010, the doctors found a brain tumor. Brian and Lindsey have since then sold their home, 2 cars, moved in with their brother and sister, and found a home for one of their dogs. All the while praising the Lord for His faithfulness!

Praying for them has been an honor, and I believe the Lord has laid it on my heart to donate 20% of my sales and to make available a way for others to get involved. The Ponds have never asked for money, only prayer. I know our Father can meet all of their needs regardless of our help.

I want to help- will you join me in
giving to meet a real need in their life?

I will have items available to sell at the ladies luncheon at EGC on Saturday December 11. You can find pictures of most of what I have to sell in the previous post. 20% of cost of all items sold this weekend and until I send out the money to Lindsey, (hoping to send it early next week-but if I get more orders I will wait to be able to send her more.) Also, as long as they last I have a bundle of 6 prim tags to everyone who gives a donation to Brian and Lindsey.

I am believing we are meeting a real physical need for these dear hearts.
Please check out her blog, bless her with your prayers and meet a real need while shopping for Christmas or just giving to them.

Items I have for sale

Please reserve anything you see that you like, some items I only have one of.

Please read the above post as well, I am giving 20% of all sales to Lindsey Pond.

Apple pie filling $4.50

Mini Ornaments $1

Medium ornaments $2.50

Handpainted Snowman ornament $4.00



Birdhouse painting on Slate $18

Snowflakes are Angels Kisses $20

Count Your Blessings on Barn shingle $40

Double sided Primitive Christmas Hearts $25

Double Sided Primitive Seasonal Heart $25

Double Sided Primitive Seasonal Heart $25

(snowman on all, choice of spring)

A set of all three hearts (6 paintings) for $65

Simple Pleasures cupboard $125

10"X15"X33"

Date day

Can you tell what the theme was of our date day? It was a flat out wonderful day!

Sugar Mountain Bake Shoppe- all I can really say is amazing

they have many different filled and iced cupcakes

these are turtle and sinfully chocolate

Umm, 2nd hand store with scary clowns-bad picture

Parkleigh, wow-totally going back, too much to see but so

worth the time amazing chocolate samples and coffee

Great Bread company, got a good loaf of a fruit and nut whole grain

Way swank record company, highly intense incense though

We also went to Stever's chocolates, got Christmas ideas plus

lots of chocolate. Chocolate blackberries, pomegranates, espresso bark

dark chocolate covered sponge candy, and a wonderful mix of nuts etc.

I can't seem to get away from the toasted chicken gyro

beyond yummage!

Husby had a gyro-huge portions as you can see

Falafel appetizer with hot sauce and tahini sauce

Lunch at Sinbad's-yummy Lebanese food

Templar Gallery-gentleman had traveled all over-neat jewelry and art

Templar Gallery's Cafe yummy apple bavarian cake

Way wacked Comic and Game store-some great Christmas gift ideas

So-they are backward, but I am too tired to change it-Park Ave

Husby and I had a wonderful date day last week on his first official day off at his new job. We decided to go to Park Ave in Rochester, NY which we have been wanting to check out for quite some time. So here are some pictures to tell ya what we did. Hopefully I can get them on in the right order. ;0)

Coffee could be my downfall...

Okay I don't really mean that! That is just silly talk, coming from a place of lack of sleep from having 2 shots of espresso yesterday after 4pm. They didn't wear off until 4am this morning...oy! Husby didn't have time to make me espresso this morning, so I decided I had to overcome my fear of blowing up my kitchen and make it myself. I am no longer afraid, and it could be really bad for me. As if my coffee addiction wasn't bad enough...now I am adding 4 shots of espresso to my day. I got a tremendous amount of stuff done today though! Hee hee, so worth it I would say.

To update: Daddy is doing well, I talk with him everyday. He is pretty much in no pain anymore, and he isn't coughing too much either. He is back to driving, and has been making fairly regular trips to town. Today he met with the physical therapist who will see him 3 times a week for the next 30 weeks. I think he is really looking forward to going, and the regularity will be a good thing for him. He sounds a bit lonely, of which I feel horribly for. I know at this time I can't do anything about that, but I still hurt for him.

I have been trying to organize the house a bit. I feel like "stuff" has taken over and I really hate that. I packed away the summer clothes, and some of the peices of the clothes I brought home of mum's. I am not in that size yet, so they will stay packed til I am, hopefully it won't be too long. Husby and I consolidated some boxes in Sen's room to make his closet more useful. I think it looks much better and there is still space as we start to move things around a bit more.

My fabric stash is all washed and ironed, I even dared to let husby be in the room while I organized it...I say that in lieu of the fact that up til now, I don't think he paid much attention to how much fabric I had. He was laughing as I was so excited to put it all together. I put it in the clear plastic drawers according to color, so maybe it will be even easier to find what I want to use. As soon as I got that done...I decided I am going to paint for a while--fickle, that is me--can't stay with one creative thing for a long time ever. I am working on some snowmen right now.

I am looking for some quilting classes in the area. Saturdays are going to be hard for me to sit here at home alone. Husby has a wonderful new job, but has to work on Saturdays, so I need to find me sumptin' to do with my morning...Still looking...

Surreal Season

This time in my life has been so stretching, to the point of being surreal. Sometimes I have felt like I was looking in from the outside and sometimes I begged to 'be' looking from the outside. All the while I know my Lord has been for me.

Mum passed away on August 10, 2010 and daddy had a mitral valve repair done on his heart on September 1, 2010. In between, I am not sure I really breathed. I was so concerned that daddy wouldn't be able to handle the surgery, or that because mum was gone-he might not feel like living anymore. I just don't know that I could cope with losing him right now too. Well, he did very well, his surgeon was thrilled by his progress. I spent a total of 3 weeks with him, taking care of him, helping him, and preparing his house for easier maintenance. I was genuinely scared that I might do something that would hurt him, feed him the wrong food, forget his medicine, hurt him while I was helping him up or putting his socks on... I couldn't get beyond the awesome responsibility of it all. Although, I felt so blessed that he would allow me to come care for him in such a precious way. I truly felt honored that he wanted me to help him. He has enough meals for about a month, ha ha. I hope he eats them...

I know I don't need to worry about him, I know who has my back and therefore cares about and for what I do. I'm not worried as much as concerned. That he won't be lonely, depressed, bored, hungry for yummy food, that he takes care of his health, that he remembers his medicine, that he remembers we love him.

With that said I am so glad to be home. It too is surreal, I honestly wasn't sure when I would get to come back home. I missed my home, husby, and kitty. I still miss my son. I miss myself. I don't feel she is here right now. I keep getting told it will get easier, I know it will, I have much hope. It just isn't better, today. Tomorrow is another day. I have peace that passes all understanding, I will stand with that for right now. Joy will come in the morning...

Words can't truly express...

I know I need to write something, but words can not truly express how much my heart is hurting right now. I know as time goes on it will diminish some, but will never really stop. I know my mum is with her Savior right now, praising and worshipping him. I know I will see her again someday... all of this I know and yet the tears come.

My mum wasn't perfect but she was perfect for me. God knew who I needed to draw me to Him, to rely on His strength, to bring me to my knees. We loved each other, encouraged each other, frustrated each other and hurt each other. We talked, made up, yelled, laughed...all the things mother's and daughter's do.

I got the opportunity to take my mum to the fair in our hometown on July 31. We had a blast playing bingo, eating all sorts of yummy food, people watching and checking out the quilts and handmade goods. I am so glad we got to go. I am so grateful to the Lord for giving me that time with her. I will never forget it.

On Monday August 9, I called Mum about 9:30 at night, just to talk to see how she was doing. I laughed with her as she told me how she had just talked with my younger brother Kevin who was on a ferris wheel at the beach. She told me about the excitement during the week with my sisters, shopping, eating out, going to see my neices new house. She was coughing a bit and sounded tired--but not abnormally so...I asked her if she was going to do a breathing treatment and she said "yeah, I probably should" knowing full well she probably wouldn't-haha. I told her, "I love you, mommy!" and she said, "oh, I love you too, honey." She said she was tired so I said goodnight and I would call again soon.

I got off the phone and told Shawn that I really felt it might not be very long for mum. Well, that night at around midnight my mommy passed away. I got the call about 12:30 from my brother to call Daddy and when I did he told me he had found her. I heard the pain in his voice...as if losing my mum wasn't heartrending enough...to feel that pain as well...

I have no idea what this season of my life will hold, I am sad, scared, hopeful, contemplative...I miss her already, I missed her before she was gone...God be my strength through this, please?

Things that have kept me busy this Spring/Summer

First I started in late February working on this table and 2 others just like it for a friend Genevieve. They had to be sanded, then on the sides we used paint stripper, now finally after about 5 months, I am finally to the repainting stage. Not that it really took that long, there were just so many interuptions. Some pleasant, some not so pleasant.

Many many trips to see this woman, my mum, some in the hospital and some at their home. She is doing much better it seems, this time around. I hope to have her around for quite some time yet.

After finishing the Bible block quilt that I was working on with a small group in our church. I tackled a quilt for my mum. I wanted her to have a tangible way to know she is loved. On each side of her quilt there is a phrase to encourage her by.

In the meantime I worked on 4 of these little quilts(2 each)-wall hangings if you will, to give myself something to work on while I was sitting for weeks in the hospital with mum. They are works in progress still, all 4 in various stages of progress. I am hoping to sell these at some point.

Then somewhere in there I had this piece commissioned, a sweet friend wanted it for their son and daughter in law for their anniversary. It was something I had never done before, so it was alot of fun to do.

This sweet friend,

Sissy came to see me.

I got the opportunity in May to cater a rehearsal dinner for a dinner friend. She asked me to decorate and cook. I was very honored that she would entrust me with it all, and I believe she was quite pleased by how it turned out. We had chicken parmigiana, pasta marinara, and penne alfredo, salad, brushetta and breads. Dessert was hot fudge pudding cake with vanilla ice cream.

The table center pieces were; a square of mod black and white fabric on a white linen tablecloth, with a rectangular mirror tile offset. On top of the mirror tile was tulling in an S shape with funky black beads draped randomly on the tulle. In opposite corners were black and white photos in black frames of the bride and groom at different stages of their lives. For a pop of color their were Gerbera daisies in white vintage vases and one bloom nestled among the crystal candle cups. I think it turned out very well with the white dishes and black napkins. Black and white was not a theme of their wedding, I was just trying to go for something elegant and chic. As they are both photographers the set up seemed to work well.

Then our cutie patootie nephew, Trenton, came to play for a week in June...couldn't have asked for a better respit after the last time with my mum in the hospital. I love having him come and am hoping he will be able to one more time this summer.

Somewhere this Spring/Summer we finally got to use the Cheesecake Factory gift card we had gotten last Christmas from Shawn's supervisor. It was amazing. We actually had a date...outside-it felt so bistro ish-haha. We then went for a walk in Pittsford on the Erie Canal. I love being with my husby.

Most recently my bestie came to spend a week with me and husby. She brought her two younger boys with her. They were alot of fun to have-busy, busy, busy...wow does she have her hands full! God knows she can do it with His strength, what a good mama she is too! I laugh alot, thinking I could be where she is and thank God He gave us Sen, and changed my season! I am looking forward to grand bubbies now--not RIGHT now, slightly distant future...NOT NOW!! Ha ha!



Isn't she beautiful? She is actually older by a month and 11days, she looks like a teenager...It's in her genes-her mum looks amazing too!

I am sure there are many things I have forgotten like; taking care of Daddy while Mum is in the hospital, cafe stuff, cooking, baking, ordering out to Sinbad's, going to Longpoint Park with Sherri, a few trips to see Gram Neitz-and her blessing me with a bunch of her way cool vintage jewelry, sewing a skirt for share, 3 nursing covers for various chums, obsessively checking out blogs and trying to win fabric (as if I need anymore-later post), organizing my house-oh yeah there was a yard sale with friends in there too. So now I have to go, I posted while the paint was drying on the tables and now I am sure it is, so...off to do the checker boards...

Have a good one!

PS I tried to figure out how to change where the wording was in context to the pics and just couldn't do it--1/2 hour later I give up! Sorry for any confusion...

Oy---yet again a long time...

I should put somewhere on my blog that if you expect consistancy and blogger loyalty...I am not the blogger for you. I try, I think about blogging and then I just don't do it.

My mom has been ill again, early May through most of June. She is on the mend again though.

Then I had our wonderful nephew Trenton come visit for a week. Oh my word, was that a blast and oh so tiring!! Worth it though, oh so worth it!

Then this last week my sweet childhood friend Sherri and her two youngest sons came to play for a week. Again, it was alot of fun, and tiring and fun, fun, fun. We had a few good talks, a slight accident causing lots of pain in my right ankle and then a pretty much miraculous healing--lots of swimming previous to said accident. Gave Sher a pedicure and hopefully some good laughs, and a bit of rest.

So the last 2 months have been super duper busy, and we are hoping to have some down time for a week. Of course down time will hopefully include: work on the tables I owe Gen, 2 skirts for Sherri, a tablerunner to be quilted with Nancy, blueberry picking, making a cheesecake for Daddy, and connecting with some friends that I have sorely missed.

God's Chisel - The Skit Guys

The best husby evs!

This past weekend my husby surprised me with a little mini vacation. After dealing for the last 6 months with my mums declining health and recently being in PA due to mum being in the ICU, my husby decided we needed to disappear for a couple of days.

We went to a hotel for a night and just spent time together talking about everything and nothing. It was so wonderful. He knows me so well, and knew I needed this...I didn't know how much until we were gone and in the hotel. Ah, it was heaven. What a blessing to just be anonymous and not have to answer the phone. We have never gone away like that before. I mean, not frivolously, for no reason but rest...

On our trip we stopped at a moving sale, and were blessed with a few really good finds. A foot massager for Shawn (has heat) in store for $38 we got for $5-hee hee. Also, in our "window shopping" we were trying on some colognes and I loved the Dolce Gabana Blue...got that at the ms for $15- it was $80 in Macy's--love how God blesses us with wants along with needs. Lastly, we got a huge bag of quilting fabric for a fraction of its worth. I am so excited, I have started to do some quilting and hate to spend the money for retail fabric. It is so nice to be able to pick from fabric I have and not have to spend much to make something beautiful. It will be many hours of fun and probably lots of gifts for my favorite peops.

Isn't God wonderful for blessing me with such an amazing husby? Now today he has done the dishes up and is making me soup---I am sickly and he is so sweet to take care of me.

I love him so very much...God please bless him abundantly beyond anything he could hope for or imagine.

Home Sweet Home

Ah, it is so good to be home. Something about a purring kitty greeting us at the door, the smells of our home and the coziness of our bed---just puts me in a calmer mood. It is tranquil here, soothing, peaceful...Thank you Lord, for your presence.

I had a dr. appt today...I haven't been feeling very well lately. Kind of in a funk for the better part of the year. I would say I started out a bit depressed, then just stopped caring about some medical things that I really "shouldn't" let go. Anyway, me dr was ticked--'yelled' in his firm voice...and now having been appropriately poked and prodded, I should be on the mend. So excited to be feeling better.

Did get a scolding though that struck a nerve and a half...Dr. said I was following in my mum's footsteps as far as not taking care of myself the way I ought to. It definetly made me realise that I don't want to go down that path. I owe it to my family to work harder to care about myself and for myself. I owe it to myself...Here goes---to another year for Him!

Wrestling with thoughts

She wants to die, mum WANTS to die. I hear it in what she says, how she talks, the looks she gives. She is so angry that daddy took her to the hospital. Mum keeps talking about when this happens again...she just wants daddy to sit on the couch and cuddle with her. Like she is dying from cancer and can't do anything about what is killing her. IF mum would choose to do her breathing treatments, IF mum would check her blood sugar, IF IF IF, she could live for some years yet. BUT her choice is to not do the breathing treatments when she is home. (right now mum is doing all she is told to do...cause of being in the ICU---but when she goes home...)

I am so frustrated. I can't even begin to understand this. How do you just decide to stop wanting to live? How do you just decide to leave your loved ones, just because you don't want to try anymore. Listen, I understand giving up the good fight...this seems more like depression to me. So how do you try to convince your parent to receive more help, as in psychiatric help?

Please Lord, remind her that you number our days and it is up to us to live them out the way you ask us to. Lord, you know my heart is not to judge my mum, help me to continue to express your grace to her. I know my expressions can reflect the pain in my heart, and I am definetly in pain right now.

I am not ready to lose my mum. My heart is so broken at the idea of not being able to call her, talk to her, to hug her, hold her hand. To never hear her voice again...God I need your strength, your peace, your comfort...I can't do this alone.

A look

How can a look cut so deep? How can a look melt a heart? How can a look provoke tears to stream down my face? How do our eyes say so much?

They truly are the windows to our soul.

God please help my eyes reflect you. My love for you...Your love through me...Your compassion, grace, mercy... YOU and YOU ALONE, Lord.

Waiting

As I sit here once again in the ICU waiting room, I wonder how the day will go.

God is faithful, and we are here to walk it out. I say that--sitting here...

What Lord, will you ask me to walk out. Patience with my siblings...graciously taking what I need to, in order for them to see you somehow? I need Your strength Lord, to do so. I can not do this on my own...I don't have it in me. ONLY IN YOU. Please Lord help me to exemplify you. Help me to have peace, to be peaceful, and to know that you are showing through me/us. Please help me to not blow it.

This post is more for me to write out what I am feeling...Sorry, if it doesn't connect with anyone else.

No apologies--it is just life.

I know, I know it has been forever since I have blogged. Something got into me a while ago, that everyone was judging me and so I didn't need one more avenue where folks could judge me. But I have decided, this blog was for me. I am glad if my friends follow, but really it is for me.

This past year was awesome, amazing and painful all in one year.

I have lost 126 pounds-and there I have plateaued...frustrating but at the same time I know where I am at, and where I would like to be. Yes I have set a goal--no I am not sharing it here.

I have learned and stood up for myself, I am not a project, I am a person. I will get back on track with my weight, with the Lord's help-no one else.

I have gotten to paint a bunch this year, made jellies with the fruits around campus, learned to crochet, and did some cool projects for friends! Found some amazing recipes and got to cater a meal for Denver and the Mile High Orchestra.

Shawn and I took our first ever trip by ourselves together to Texas. It was wonderful and we could really see ourselves living down there with the Callahan's. (Shawn's Sis and her fam)

Had many great times going to Sen's concerts at school, had an awesome summer with him, getting to know him again-now as a young adult.

Had the most fabulous experience of going to NYSUM with the EBI Juniors in September. We did homeless ministry, clown ministry, ferry and subway ministry. It was all so interesting and provoking. I could do it everyday. Alas, my husby loves the country. But we both love, love, love, the juniors and ministering with them. We would so do it again in a minute!

On the way home from NYSUM I got the call that my mum had been taken to the emergency room. They (the hospital) were going to let her die, but my dad and two siblings said no-to do whatever was necessary to give her a chance. We got home, and left again within 10minutes, and were in PA at the hospital short of 2 hours later. My mom stayed in Sayre for just short of 3 weeks, and in Troy for rehab 5 days (should have been 2 more weeks). I was in PA for 21 days. It was a very difficult time. I hated seeing my mum like that. I am so very glad she recouped. I wish she would have more of a will to live. It is so hard to hear the depression in her voice, and how she refuses to do the things she needs to in order to extend her days. I desire so many things for her--most of all that she would understand the FATHER's love for her. She has held onto so much hurt from her life. It breaks my heart to think of all she has gone through. But I know that without God to be her strength and comfort--it is all she will dwell on. I choose to not live that way, I pray she will too...soon.

Our Christmas was very nice. The three of us together, a great friend, a great meal, a great time. We went shopping the next day and then headed to PA for overnight. It was a nice time.

I guess that is all for now, hopefully it won't be so long between blogs. Here's to the New Year, new choices, strength, and wisdom for the future. God bless us all!