Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas--O Holy Night

Merry Christmas everyone! Christ was born to save us, praising God every day is a joy for this gift!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

He is worthy of all praise!

Since my last post, I have had a rough week, starting with progessively worse pain, until I had to go to the ER for help. I was not sure what the problem was, but ended up finding out it is scar tissue "healing" around a nerve-possibly entrapping it and thereby causing pain. I was given 3 shots of Lidocaine and walah--no more pain. That is til I was home and realised the insane pain was masking other "normal" pain. I think there may be one more spot that could have used a shot, but it isn't nearly as bad. I have been blessed by husby and friends to be able to really rest and take it easier than I was--so I am feeling relatively no pain. God is so very good!

I wanted to share that with all the wonderful friends that have come to be with me; we have had amazing conversations. Some are healing for me, others healing for them-all encouraging, edifying, and oh so enlightening. My friends are real, and have seen me in my "realest" place. They are so loving, non-judging, and kind. I am a very blessed woman and thank the Lord so much for true sisters in the Him. In every facet of this "cancer" process He has surpassed my hopes of His care for me. It has challenged me to not put His love in a box of my making...His love is way beyond imaginable--just enjoy it!

I found myself singing an old praise song taken from this verse and just had to share His goodness...

Psalm 86:12-13
I will praise you, O Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever.

For great is your love toward me;
you have delivered me from the depths of the grave.

Thank you, whomever is reading-I hope you are edified and challenged to see yourself loved...

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

My soul glorifies the Lord!!

And Mary said:

“My soul glorifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me— holy is his name. Luke 1:46-49

I know this verse ultimately is Mary's Song and is speaking of her virgin pregnancy with Christ, but I have to just proclaim that this is also for our day.

My soul is glorifying the Lord--today I received the wonderful news that I am cancer free. My heart rejoices in this news. I pray that as I have been walking through this battle, my words and actions have been encouraging, uplifting, glorifying to He who has done wonders in my life. I hope that others have been drawn closer to Him, have desired a relationship with Him, have witnessed the goodness and sovereign love for us that He has. I pray I have been a good witness, to anyone else that may be asked to walk through something like cancer. Knowing the Lord has many plans--I am looking forward to all He is going to work out in this.

Please be encouraged-God is for you, and if He is for you-who can be against you! In what may seem to be the worst times of your life-He has a plan, and it is for your good and His glory. You will be matured in Him-if you choose to let Him do so. You will grow closer to Him as you become weaker if you allow Him to be stronger. He longs for you dear one...let Him walk it out with you--you won't regret you dependence on Him!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Humility in a righteous soul

God has been working on my heart alot about humility.

All through this time with cancer, walking through the times of fear, feeling His peace that passes all understanding, knowing that friends are on their knees all over the world praying for me--I have been humbled.

There have been times during this season that the Father has asked me to let others minister to me...for some, this wouldn't be hard, for me--it is a difficult place. I love to do for others, it isn't as easy for me to be vulnerable and receive. The Lord has been ministering to my heart that to not allow others to bless me/us, is a place of pride in my heart. I was so saddened by the thought, that I just had to share--lest anyone else have the same attitude. He gives us giftings, abilities, and talents to share with others to be sure--but He also allows us to be in times when we need our brothers and sisters in the faith to minister to our needs-physical, emotional and spiritual.

I don't want to be prideful, I don't pursue it--but when I think less of myself than what He created; then I am being as prideful as if I was out touting all my wonderful attributes.

Instead I desire to walk out righteousness-the Lord wants us to know that we are righteous in Him. I am righteous in Him, as I understand I John 2:29 "If you know that he is righteous, you know that everyone who does what is right has been born of him." I know I am born in Christ, so it isn't prideful to say I am righteous. So knowing that--Psalm 97:11 says, "Light shines on the righteous and joy on the upright in heart." I have felt the Lord's joy even in these last weeks of waiting, it has been incredible how the Father has been faithful. People have commented on my countenance on many occasions. It isn't me, but He who is in me! Praise Him!

As He reminds me of the righteous state I am in, because I believe, I can relax and let people bless us, with their time, prayers, food, etc. I can enjoy and be a joy to those who love us. I don't need to feel self conscious that others are meeting my very personal needs as I recover--they are doing it out of love for me. I can know fully that Christ has placed such people into my life for such a time as this! I am so humbled, and so completely and thoroughly blessed by those He has placed in my life right now.

HEALTH UPDATE: I had surgery on November 4 they did a radical hysterectomy with lymph node removal. The Dr. said he saw nothing to indicate the cancer had spread beyond my uterus. The lab results would take 7-10 days to come back. I was in the hospital just overnight and came home on Saturday. It has been one week now and I have had good days and less than good days-I think mainly due to lack of sleep (can't get comfy). I am not in real pain, just uncomfortable. Tuesday the 15th I meet with the oncologist to see where we are at. I am believing for the best of reports and of course will share with you all my results as quickly as I am able.

I appreciate all who are reading this blog. Your comments bless me. I need to mention though, that if I don't know who you are (anonymous)-no matter how sweet your comment may be, I can't publish it. You may notice other anonymous comments, it is because I know who they are via other means. I am sorry if this may hurt your feelings in any way, it is not my desire to do so. I feel very personal about what is said on my blog, as I am sure anyone who has one does, and if I can not know whom you are then only I will be blessed by your sweetness. Thank you for your consideration in this.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

A little treasure from the Lord.

Psalm 71:14-24 -
Hope for Deliverance

14 But as for me, I will always have hope;
I will praise You more and more.
15 My mouth will tell of Your righteousness,
of Your salvation all day long,
though I know not its measure.
16 I will come and proclaim Your mighty acts,
O Sovereign Lord;
I will proclaim Your righteousness, Yours alone.
17 Since my youth, O God, You have taught me,
and to this day I declare Your marvelous deeds.
18 Even when I am old and gray,
do not forsake me, O God,
Till I declare Your power to the next generation,
Your might to all who are to come.
19 Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God,
You who have done great things.
Who, O God, is like You?
20 Though You have made me see troubles,
many and bitter,
You will restore my life again;
From the depths of the earth
You will again bring me up.
21 You will increase my honor
and comfort me once again.
22 I will praise You with the harp
for Your faithfulness, O my God;
I will sing praise to You with the lyre,
O Holy One of Israel.
23 My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to You—
I, whom You have redeemed.
24 My tongue will tell of Your righteous acts all day long,
for those who wanted to harm me
have been put to shame and confusion.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

November 4th is surgery day...

I ask for your prayers, for myself and family-yes...but more prudently I really have been impressed by the Lord to ask for prayers for His purposes... What I am meaning by that is--there is a plan in all of isn't just about me and the cancer.

I believe with my whole being that there is opportunity here for a profound move of God in the hospital where I will be. Would you join with me and pray for the surgeon, his staff, the anesthesiologist, nurses, cafeteria people, assistants, whomever may cart me from room to room, phlebotomists, etc... Please pray for wisdom as they work with me, but more importantly pray that as they work on/with me, they will feel and know the presence of God. I know the Lord is in me, and believe He will move through me to bless, love on, encourage everyone who comes within my reach. Pray that seeds will be planted, that we will see people saved, that folks will be astounded by God's peace. I have been praying that if I need to go through this, then let it be about something bigger, that God would be glorified through it all.

If you wouldn't mind leaving a comment to let me know you are praying that would be wonderful.

As a praise to the Lord, I would like to share with you all...Ever since the diagnosis and I asked that my friends would pray for me to have has He ever come through! I meet people often who say they can see how at peace I am as I share with them what has been transpiring in our lives lately. It is all the Lord, seriously, all HIM! I have truly been living in the palm of His hand. I have moments-but I take those thoughts captive as He says I should, and then they are gone=Thank You LORD! You are worthy of all the glory!

Thank you so much friends for reading my lil blips...

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Really fighting for my life

They are worth fighting for...I am worth fighting for...2 weeks ago I found out I am literally in a fight for my life...I have Endometrial cancer. 2 weeks ago, alot changed in my perspective, my breathing, my focus--but not my Lord, he is never changing, ever constant.

I know He loves me, I KNOW he has a plan in this...a plan for my good and His glory. I know in his love there is no fear-his perfect love casts out all fear. I know the joy of the Lord is my strength...I will have joy within this season--not waiting til I am through it, but right here in it!

I will praise Him all of my days--yes even these! Am I concerned-yup, but not struck with terror, nope. Have I thought about dying, yup--but I am taking thoughts like that captive, because I know they are not godly, I know they will cause me to think things that are not true...God is faithful, every minute of everyday.

So, some facts---endometrial cancer starts in the lining of the uterus. Funny story: 6 years ago we moved to NY where I got to go to this amazing gynecologist. Because of a condition I have- she would regularly (every 6 months) give me a biopsy, it had become part of the "regular" routine. Over the last 2 years, due to mum's illness and passing, I hadn't gotten to my appointments--so when I went to see her in the beginning of August-the routine biopsy-I think may have saved my life. IF it had not been already in the routine--she wouldn't have done it, you see, the pap didn't show it, the in/out ultrasound didn't show it--ONLY the biopsy showed it! Right there, God is sooo faithful! 6 years ago, he set me up with my dr. I am a very blessed woman! It tells me so clearly that God has this all under control--He is aware of my difficulty, he is not leaving me! I know some may ask, why didn't he stop the cancer then? I don't know, what I do know is: He has a plan in this...for my good and His glory! He gives us opportunities to grow in Him, draw closer to Him and share His love with others--Praise God!

Is every minute of every day happy go lucky? Nope, but every minute of every day is an opportunity to choose to be...I hope more of my minutes I am choosing to be.

Other facts: Planning laproscopic surgery (radical hysterectomy with lymph node removal) hopefully by the end of October, 5-6 weeks of recovery is to be expected. If the cancer is contained completely within the uterus then I am home free--if it is outside whatsoever, then radiation and chemo may be necessary.

Well, guess that is it for now...sorry to lay this all on you. Don't be sad...I trust God knows what He is doing! I will ask though, please pray! Thank you!